A few

I love analogies....when it comes to dating, work, everything in between. :)

Yesterday when i was talking with a friend who was particularly stressed about a big inspection/apartment hunting day, i came up with this which i found really amusing.

Basically about 1 month ago i was in the exact same shoe. and i had to do that, MULTIPLE times in 2017 because, well, my situation in Australia just wasn't very stable due to various reasons. but that's beside the point.

So in Australia, you go on these scheduled inspections that are scheduled during a fixed time throughout the week/weekend. And it has been a 'landlord'(?)'s market in that as soon as something half decent is posted, it is snatched up right away.

Anyway, most people, depending on how urgent/desperate, usually have about a week, or sometimes a day (i've experienced both) to find something, apply for something, and land something, and sign something, and move something in 7 days later. ://///// beating competing desperate offers along the way.

So that gives you about one-two weekends to hunt. it's a full time job. So you can line up all your inspections in/around the areas you're looking for (and these inspections can be as short as 15 min to 30min). if you missed it - tough luck. And if you didn't have a car, you better get that uber or your strong leg muscles ready.

My friend has about 10 inspections today. and she was feeling quite nervous as she's had a roommate since she moved here, and many professionals (and i mean things like banking and decent corporate job), although in their mid/late 30s or even 40s, could still have roommates. I was quite amazed when i realised this when i previously lived in SG and now Sydney, because i definitely compromise on space, and live in a match box, than having roommates, which can be a hit or miss. but as adults, i kind of don't want to deal with drama/their hook ups/quirks/unwelcomed come-ons/crush on a roommate...i've been through all that. But anyway, for many people it is still a big leap to go from sharing --> having a place of their own.

So in our conversation i started talking about how i see these inspections EXACTLY like online/speed dating. Basically, you spend nights browsing through the housing app, found a few things you like based on the description and these amazing picture, line up all these potentials for inspections....get your hopes up....then..

you go on these 15 min flash inspections. like speed dating. most of the times you walk in and you're like WTF. were those pictures taken in the 80s?! the actual place looks super run down. Then the furniture (if it's furnished)...why was everything swapped to something distasteful ("oh because that couch was too expensive so you can only use this one"), then the hallway leading to the apartment or the other units look like the last mile in the prison, despite how much they decorate it like an airbnb on the inside, or the space looks 10x smaller than pictured, or it's actually located in the dungeon/basement so all that natural lighting in the picture were from..well unnatural lighting. so you got your hopes up, you have this one thing you thought would be 'the one'. and you walked out defeated...you can blame it on the landlords of sydney, or the housing prices, or previous tenants...for the terrible condition of these places. but then you get to a point where you'er tired and cranky and you start to question yourself.

ARE MY STANDARDS TOO HIGH? SHOULD I JUST PICK SOMETHING, ANYTHING? OTHER PEOPLE SEEM TO HAVE FOUND A PLACE THAT THEY ARE HAPPY WITH? IS IT ME? SHOULD I COMPROMISE THESE (ACTUALLY VERY REASONABLE) CRITERIA I HAVE?

As a side note, when i went on these inspections, i do get very tired/frustrated/hungry and you only have a moment to sit in a park with lots of bird shit next to you and eat a sandwich before you have to go again. and also you go on these inspections where it's currently occupied by couples, and surrounded by couples, when you are looking a place on your own. it just wasn't the greatest feeling in the world. even though you probably really deserve a pat on the shoulder for being able to afford a place for two on your own. maybe i was being a bit weak those days but i felt a bit awkward for literally being this one girl in every inspection. (i also don't understand why in modern relationship people move in and out and around and internationally with partners like they are in a married relationship and buy appliances and do shit like married couples do). i just don't have the patience to test drive/be test driven for my commitment. i prefer to share those experiences with someone who wants to continue to do these things with me. that's beside the point again.

Then finally, you start to apply for shit all over the place, some you have liked and met 80% of your criteria, some you haven't even seen before because you are getting kicked out and have not a confirmation...then you get 'no response', and rejected by even places you were not sure about....

UNTIL  one day, the place you saw that you did feel like could be the one, actually accepted you. you remember sensing during the inspection the agent does like your profile and encouraged you to apply.  then on the phone actuallly said he could hold other inspections until you get your thing sorted out....and then YOU GOT IT. the place with a little terrace that you thought you could set up a outdoor sanctuary with pillows and furnitures, and the kitchen has a U-shaped counter that is conducive to the cooking you hope to do in your new place. nice and comfy and simple decor. not new and smells like old victoria houses, but it reminds you of home. the commute is a bit far, but the more you put your stuff in it, the more you see it as your own. and then you feel like all those disappointments...were probably leading you to this place, which you did see on the first/second day.

I guess what i am trying to say is that, as i now sit on my lovely IKEA lounger with spotted pillows behind my back, drinking a freshly brew coffee and typing this up, with books next to me i plan to read for hours after this, is that things will be OKAY. i say this to my friend but also myself.

you will get your hopes up with these speed dating/online dating and will be horrified along the way, but everything will be okay. it's not you. yes you missed this one apartment that is right in your building just a different unit with a reasonable rent, but there will be new ones posted tomorrow, in buildings/areas you've never considered before. and you might miss an apartment bc the agent was a total dick and out of the flurry of requests he didn't give a shit about your application, but there will be an agent who cares, and you want to get a property from someone like that because as a renter there's lots of maintenance/communication that ensues that you need a good agent for. Everything i wanted fixed after moving in - was done without a question.

Maybe i got lucky. but i think if we all try really hard and just be really resilient and true to what we are looking for, and never take shit, we may all get lucky one day, even if that person if with ourselves.

(and really, a lot of people hate their rented partments/stuck in a neighbourhood they bought their property in and now so they can get on the housing prices boom). We just don't know the back story.