ugh! the 9 days of consecutive Chinese New Year vacation is over as of 1 minute ago. Darn!
A quick reflection before i am off to bed until the dreadful monday.
I spent the day with my maternal grandma and auntie and cousins, and my parents. and i saw them just a week ago because my grandma was in Taipei to visit. I have to say, i've REALLY enjoyed family time thus far. This compared to last year is like heaven to hell. I think about this sometimes, how fortunate i am to be able to live here, during this time, and see everyone while they are still alive and well, when my parents are still healthy and can enjoy the good food and places we visit.
Even visits to the malls feel different. Yes there's a lot of good shopping in the US. and cheap discount shopping. But i enjoy shopping with people who i care about a lot more. I can shop alone, in fact i don't mind shopping alone at all. I get more done within a short time. Whether it's shopping for xmas gifts, clothes, shoes, or books. But i'm kind of over that now. visiting B&N, Ross, Marshalls, nordstrom Rack, Malls, Starbucks...and those places alone. I don't think alone means 'lonely' necessarily. Rather i just become a very efficient robot, i go in, i get things done, and i leave. There is no fun in it anymore because i've become somewhat jaded. But i suppose everything in Asia is still new to me. It's new in a way that there's ao many varieties here, and old in a way that things and places and people are still very familiar to me, i'm just looking at them with a new set of eyes and attitude. For some reason, i enjoy it a lot more. Even if i was just window shopping.
I guess what i am trying to say is, i really enjoying being 'home' in taiwan. i can make plans and actually see relatives who i've wanted to see for a long time. and it's no longer 'i will call you next time i come back - in six months'. rather it's 'next week'. And when we meet next time they bring me a lot of things, foods my grandma had prepared for me, and we meet at a restaurant near their home that they're dying to take me to. And afterward we walk around the mall some more, go back to either their or our place and sit around the living room, watching new year's special and chat about random nothings. and eat chinese candies.
Just pieces of memories i forgot how much i enjoyed before.
I don't know what my next step is. And as my uncle said when i explained the whole job situation to him (work is trying to make me move again, and i said no to China --details to come in tomorrow's post), and he said, are you sure it's the right decision? I paused for a second because i asked myself that question many times before. but i know that for now, it IS the right decision.
